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Spotlight: Sigrid Kulkowitz LMFT

posted at 2025-06-22 12:14:00
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My name is Sigrid Kulkowitz. I am a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist, and consultant. Though I got licensed in my early 50”s I have a long history of working with people as a coach, an acupuncturist, a midwife assistant, as a crisis counselor, and in schools working with a child assault prevention project (other incarnations were as baker, waitperson, house cleaner, artist and dancer). I interned at Guthrie Hospital in  Sayre, PA (thanks to Rich Gallagher for getting me in the door and working together there). I am now in private practice.

My achievements over several years focus on teaching others about IFS, most recently finishing a six-week basics course at EcoVillage, and doing an in-service at Tompkins County Mental Health, as well as my usual bi-monthly consultation group for IFS therapists that I offer.

I have been practicing in the Ithaca area for 12 years. My specialty is working with adults with trauma histories and supporting parents with trauma histories with current relationship and parenting issues.

The resources I turn to most are increasing my knowledge and skill with IFS. One of the best resources I frequent is the IFS Institute website (ifs-institute.com). I also listen to IFS podcasts (one of my favorites is The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger) and regularly spend time learning from Dick Schwartz (IFS founder) and other practitioners from the many IFS You Tubes with different talks and demonstrations. I also follow Dr. Vanessa Lapointe and Jon Fogel on punishment-free parenting, whom I regularly share their resources with my clients.

It’s hard to say just one thing I appreciate about the Ithaca Region. I never tire of its beauty. I love that there are no major highways nearby. I like that we, as a community, put effort into trying to be more fair and equitable, even as we often fail miserably.

What areas of mental health do you specialize in, and why are those areas important to you?

As I mentioned, I specialize in trauma because that has been the focus of my healing. I suffered trauma from a young age, from within my family and from my neighborhood growing up. I had to do my work to uncover my true self and have the internal life I now have (and continue to work on). Doing my healing has been a long, twisty road. I tried many modalities with varying success, and from each, I learned something. When I came across IFS and got trained 9 years ago, I never looked back because it was the first time I experienced a consistent deep shift in my relationship to myself and my injured parts, and got to understand from the inside out the experience of the process of healing from trauma. I now know a lot more not only about the impacts of trauma but also about how terrifying, challenging, and rewarding a healing journey can be. My work gives me an intimate knowledge of what I am asking of my clients, what a challenging and brave journey I am supporting them to embark upon, and what big space I need to hold for them as they take these steps.

How do you stay up-to-date with the latest research and best practices in mental health?

I want to say that I read all the time, but I am dyslexic and have ADHD, which creates challenges in that department. So, I often watch and listen, reading articles or chapters instead of whole books. Since my focus is on IFS, my studies revolve around that model. I dabble in other areas, but my clear focus is on IFS.

What are some of the biggest challenges you see people facing today, and how do you help them navigate them?

Since I work with a lot of trauma, I would say that the biggest challenge is people feeling isolated and not loving themselves, as well as, over the years, people feeling more scared. My work centers on developing a loving relationship between the client and all of their injured, scared, etc. parts, including protective parts that try to serve the client by trying to keep them away from the pain. Developing compassion for oneself and self-love creates an internal environment that is more healed, connected, and therefore more robust. That is always my aim.

What is one thing you have learned from your clients that has impacted your own life?

No matter their behavior, everyone in their hearts wants healing, to feel free, and to experience love for themselves. Also, most everyone is terrified that it can’t happen to them. I have seen so much incredible vulnerability, courage, and authenticity within that turning towards oneself and all the inner parts. That shared humanity and courage have bolstered me more than I can imagine. Also, sitting with people for a piece of their healing process has been such an incredible, powerful honor that has impacted me deeply, though words don’t do it justice.